Reflections on journey vs destination

As I headed out for my run tonight I wondered what I was running for, the journey or the destination? Was I running to get to the end? Probably not since I would end up in the same place where I started with my little out and back Terwilliger route. If I was running to get a particular place, then I might as well stand still, because I started at my car, where I planned to end.

Was I running for the journey? I had never really thought about it before, but running is absolutely about the journey! Just like when I did the Helvetia Half Marathon this weekend. If the race was about getting to the finish line, then we might as well not have run at all, since it started and ended at the Hillsboro stadium! However, if the race is about the journey to the finish line, then it's well worth the time and energy!

I guess you could say the same thing about life. Sometimes it's hard to remember that the "race" we are running isn't about finishing, but is about doing our best on the journey to the finish line. It's not really about getting there fast, but staying hydrated, conquering all the little hills, turns, tired moments, and potential injuries along the way.

This has been on my mind lately. I realized a couple years ago that I wanted to live for the day I was in and not just hoping for tomorrow. I've wrestled with this idea for a while and until getting engaged, found it exceptionally difficult!! I feel bad that getting engaged has made it so much easier. For some reason, I don't mind waiting the 81 days until we get married. I want to marry Mark now, but the anticipation and putting the pieces in place are all very fun! I know that I could wish it would fly by quickly and the wedding would be here in a moment and I could get upset about all there is to do and sometimes wish we weren't going to the trouble, but why not enjoy the journey instead? That is what I hope to do, live every day for the joy of the journey. I figure that I might as well get into a good routine with that thinking now, when it's easy. Because I'm sure one day it may not be!

By the way, I didn't run my best half marathon time, but it was within about 2 minutes of my best time, so I was pretty happy about that! I would have loved to run it a minute or 2 faster than the best time but considering we weren't really trying to do a personal best, it was great!! And we (we = me and Trisha, my running partner) ran the entire time in a good steady pace. We finished at about 11 minute miles, again. I'm really pleased with that result!

One journey that seems to have come to it's destination, is my role in student ministry. My girls are all graduated!! I've been with most of them since they were freshman and it's exciting and sad to see them graduate. Some of them are going on the 2 week Honduras mission trip leaving this Friday and others are staying home, but I think all of them have plans for college.

Since we transitioned into the college group from Insight back in February, we've already sort of eased out of the high school ministry at church and last night it all of a sudden hit me that it was over!! Last night was the prayer meeting to send off the Seniors on their mission trip. It wasn't really the meeting itself, but it just dawned on me during the meeting that the investment in students I've been making for the past 4 years is over! Until I met Mark, ministry was my life, my passion, the thing that kept me going through the day (God being the core, of course). My year revolved around camps, hanging out with kids and Insight on Sunday nights. Although I didn't mind some of those responsibilities fading a little as my relationship with Mark got deeper, I'm sad to see it all gone. I'm glad for the (appropriate) distraction of a wedding and married life this fall to get me through the adjustment of not hanging out with students any more. But I will miss them like mad crazy!! Hearing about houseboat makes me want to go, but I know it's something I can't do this year, perhaps next.

On another note, my camera died this weekend! Barb and I got it free with the computer about 3+ years ago and we've used it pretty hard since then, especially as I took up scrapbooking last year (it's a great motivation to take more pictures). Between the beginning of the half marathon this weekend and the end, it died!! Major bummer!! Mark and I are going to contribute to Barb's replacement camera and she'll let us use that before the wedding. Otherwise, we're hoping we get the one on our registry or have money after the wedding to buy a new one... it was old and time to go, but it hung in there so well! By little Kodak buddy, thanks for the memories!